September 27th
Closet Doors by Heidi Hirsch
Some of us open the door quietly.
Some start with unlocking the door and hoping a sudden burst of exhaled breath will swing the door open. Some bulldoze the door open, break the hinges off the frame, taking the closet door with them! Others use the closet to hang the gowns. No matter how you do it, the closet door has opened.
Now what?
Now that the fanfare has died down and hopefully most of the family members are still speaking to you, it’s time to venture out.
Trusting that there are a few people in your life that all ready knew (even before you did) and are willing to join you on this new path, it’s time to gather the crew and define your new self.
Sure would be nice to have a guide, something to get the ball rolling. Maybe a check list to follow. Well, it just so happens that I recently stumbled on my old scrapbook titled, It’s About Time and discovered a few solid leads to help you get started on your way.
I have outlined the five basic identities with a few characteristics that will help set your course. For those of you that have already flung that door open years ago, I hope you find this amusing and somewhat accurate. As always, I welcome comments and additions to my observations.
Fluctuating
Maybe I am, maybe I’m not! Yes, you came out of the closet but maybe it was a bit too soon. For you, the closet door is more like a revolving door. I’m out..I’m in…I’m out— you get the idea. Not gay with the family but very gay with friends. Gay when there is a festive protest, the yearly parade, a new restaurant opened by a questionable celebrity, or a new movie with gay sex scenes you’ve got to see but your steady beard has a previous engagement and you have no excuse as to why you are desperate to go. Oh sure, then you’re gay!
Artistic License
I am an artist, therefore I am what I am…when I am not what you think, I am what I really am when I am not as I am. Oh good God! You figure it out. I got exhausted after the first I am.
Social Diva
There is a private party in West Hollywood next Saturday that is “Gay Only.” You are sooo gay then. How else are you going to get into the hottest bash of the decade?! If you are out, you’re “in.” You are a Saturday night Belle of the Bars and a Sunday Brunch choir boy at Hamburger Mary’s. Monday mornings, you straighten up and get your butch on.
Politically Correct
Yikes! This is the most challenging and intense state of gay. Every aspect of your life is defined by being gay. You are GAY!!!!! It is not for the weak and timid. You walk, you talk, you eat, you sleep, you dress and glee gay! You are a 24/7 update on the ever-evolving world of gay. A watchdog. We need you!
Somewhere On The List
There are many elements that define you. Your sexuality is one of them along with a gazillion others. As exciting as the Social Diva sounds, most of us are the typical guy or gal on the street. We stand in line at Starbucks, complain about the rising cost of gas, honk the horn at the driver in front of us because they won’t get off the phone, clip coupons, dream of tropical vacations or fancy sports cars and later on wonder how our 401K is doing and how soon can we retire!
And that is me!
Standing in line at Starbucks, still dreaming of that fancy sports car, dreaming of my tropical vacation and wishing my 401K would pick up the pace!
How you come out really doesn’t matter as long as you are proud of who you are and stand tall.
Let’s celebrate October 11th – National Coming Out Day!
Aloha and Proud!
About Heidi:
As an amateur observer of the human race, Heidi is a self-appointed documentarian life’s little quirks and how to stumble through them with humor.
Maintaining that belief has brought her to that golden age of early-bird specials, senior discounts, and the VIP-AARP card.
When she isn’t acting as the arbiter of lesbian fashion, Heidi is a
professional in the themed entertainment industry. As a Project Manager, her projects include the recently opened Motiongate & Bollywood theme parks in Dubai. Currently, she is working on a new theme park in an undisclosed location in the Middle East.
Always on the lookout for new adventures, Heidi enjoys building Free Libraries and is currently co-developing an online directory for the themed entertainment industry.
Heidi has done it again with another great blog! I love her voice, humor, and the insight she brought to the sometimes tortuous act of coming out. Bravo Heidi!
Your blogs are such a great addition to LGBT Daily Spotlight. Thank you!